Ugh

Home sick from work. Snot. Ears filled with goo. Sore throat. I gots me a spring head cold. Oh well. What are you going to do?

Like Hillary losing the nomination, some things are just unavoidable.

Quick Hits: With Odd Combinations

We got one heavily armed recreational vehicle ...

Name the movie! You know you can.

Anywho, in Butler Kansas, a car dealer has started giving away guns with the purchase of a new car. That's right, guns. In fact, he recommends you choose the Kel-Tec .380 pistol because it is a "nice little gun that fits in your pocket." (See photo)

Fits in your pocket? Let me get this straight, not only is this car dealer handing out guns, he is handing out guns designed specifically to be concealed? Can he do that?

He says he started the give away in response to Barak Obama's comments about people clinging to religion and their guns. He found it offensive.

So basically, an angry conservative is handing out free, easy to conceal guns to like-minded people and it's legal. What's next? Free guns with every donation of $1,000 or more to the Republican National Committee?

And people wonder why the rest of the world has such a disgusted look on their collected faces when they look at us.

I guess the bottom line is this: if who come across a guy in a new car in Butler Kansas, he isn't that excited to see you and that really is a gun in his pocket.

Buy a Car, Get a Gun

"Mrs. Robinson, Are you voting for me?"

For those of you who follow American Idol, a little news story dissecting David Cook's win. We all know that in the end, it comes down to the demographic to which the contestants appeal. If you get to the finals, you have some level of talent, then it's about getting people to vote.

David Archuleta had the Disney crowd firmly in his corner. The teens were split, some loved Cook, some loved Archuleta. So what happened, why didn't Archuleta run away with the title?

Cougars.

That's what they are calling the sexually active middle aged women who either practice, or fantasize about, sex with younger men. And they voted like crazy for David Cook. They want him and they don't have to feel guilty because he is of legal age.

Linda Sharp, smitten as a schoolgirl, voted 473 times for Cook after Tuesday’s final performance show. The 42-year-old married mom used her land-line and cell phone — as well as her three daughters’ cell phones — to show support for the singer.

“The biggest thing: He’s legal, and that goes a long way,” said Sharp, who’s from Austin, Texas. “He’s 25. That’s old enough that we can openly ogle him, and we can drool over him, and it doesn’t make us feel like we could be his mother.”

So wait. Let me get this straight. They voted for David Cook because he is 25 they didn't feel guilty about wanting to fuck him. Doesn't that imply that one of the reasons they didn't vote for Archuleta was because they felt guilty about drooling over a 17 year-old?

A few of you out there are shaking your heads saying, "No way, the T-Dude doesn't know shit." But I merely report'em as I see'em in Quick Hits, just click on the story below for more details.

Cougars4Cook

Charles Dickens Would Be Proud

Honestly, just read the story. I won't go into all the details. The bottom line is this. A woman's house was sold out from under her, without her knowledge, to pay a $68 dental bill. The house was sold in 1996. She continued to live there, make mortgage payments etc. No one told her it had been sold until 1998. And the courts and the sheriff all agree, it's legal. Just give it a read and wonder, what kind of country do we live in when things like this can happen.

Woman Loses Home Over $68 Dental Bill

Do you wanna Twitter?

It sounds slightly dirty, doesn't it? Actually it is a way to post short blurbs from a mobile device to an online community. Twitter describes itself as

Twitter is a service for friends, family, and co–workers to communicate and stay connected through the exchange of quick, frequent answers to one simple question: What are you doing?

I'm giving it a try. What the heck -- it's free! You can follow and post messages online or via mobile device. I'm using my text friendly LG Rumor with QWERTY keyboard to post on the fly.

You only have 140 characters to play with so you have to be pithy. Frankly, I'm not sure if I like it or not, but I'm having fun playing with it. You can follow the "twitters" of as many people as you like. I've just grabbed a few randoms and I'm reading along as they post about their days. Some are funny, some stupid. It is a touch voyeuristic, but fun for the moment.

To check out Twitter.com just click: Twitter.com

If you want to follow me, just "find and follow" TheTDude

Edwards Endorses Obama

Well, if that doesn't convince the rest of you that the time has come for Sen. Clinton to step aside, what will?

Edwards has endorsed Obama. Obama has more delegates, he leads in the national polls, he leads in the popular vote. Sen. Clinton, on behalf of the Democratic Party I belong to, on behalf of the Democratic Party I have served since the age of 11, I am asking, please, suspend your campaign and join us in the true fight, the fight to regain our country.

Men and women are serving and dying in an unjust war. Families are losing their homes in a housing crisis borne from ill-advised economic policies. Gas prices artificially inflated with the blood of U.S. soldiers are making people choose between food and housing and driving. Now is not the time to let the heat of the battle cloud your judgement as to what the the right thing is to do.

I worked for the Democratic National Committee. I worked at Clinton headquarters in Little Rock in 1992. I was a minor member of your husband's administration serving at the pleasure of the President. I was on the ground fighting so that our country could change direction after the first Bush presidency. And now Sen. Clinton, as a private citizen, no longer in the trenches of political intrigue, I am asking for you to return the favor of my service, service of which I am most proud. Step aside and let us unite in a common fight against the wrongs we have suffered for the past eight years.

You say you are ready to serve. Right now, we need you to prove your willingness by stepping aside so that we can, as a party, as a country, unite around a common goal, the election of Sen. Obama to the office of the President of the United States.

Today is not your time, unless you embrace the noble act of concession that will be regarded by history as an act for the greater good. The greater good, not personal glory, is what you are fighting for, is it not?

Step aside Sen. Clinton and allow the forces of tolerance and unification to heal the wounds of this our United States. Doing so would be not only an act of leadership, but an act of the ultimate courage. The courage to ignore personal glory and gain for the greater good.

I know you are capable, I only ask that you act so that others can see the strength that I know you possess. Step aside Sen. Clinton and let the world see the hero that you can be, let the world know that we in America are not what George Bush embodies. We are united, we are compassionate, and we are strong enough to put our differences aside for the common good of all.

Quick Hits - Now With Senior Citizens

Old, White, Less Educated = A Clinton Win

There will be a huge Clinton win in the West Virginia Democratic primary. Why? Because West Virginia's demographics are a perfect fit for her. Compared to other states, West Virginia is older, whiter and less educated.

According to my wife's cousin, this is exactly why we need Obama to be the Democratic nominee. She thinks the last group of people you want deciding the future of our country are a bunch of racially homogeneous, under-educated geriatrics.

Besides, they're going to vote for McCain anyway. Remember, West Virginia went to George W. Bush in both 2000 and 2004.

CNN: Likely Clinton win in W. Virginia won't derail Obama


Patience is a Virtue

A 46-year-old Louisiana woman, in an apparent fit of anger, ran over her 90-year-old husband in the parking lot of a car wash.

Honey, I don't care how angry you were, the guy was 90! If you really wanted to kill him, just jump out from behind a door and scream "BOO!" Or even better, show a little restraint and let Mother Nature do your dirty work for you. Just like a football team up by 30 points in the fourth quarter, the clock was certainly on your side on this one.

AP: 46-Year-Old Wife Charged With Murdering 90-Year-Old Husband

Psst...Buddy, Wanna Buy a Bridge?

When I was younger, the definition of gullible was someone dumb enough to "buy" the Brooklyn Bridge. In fact, according to the Bartleby.com New Dictionary of Cultural Literacy:

The Brooklyn Bridge is mentioned in several common expressions about the sale of the bridge by one person to another (the bridge is actually public property). A person who “could sell someone the Brooklyn Bridge” is persuasive; a person who “tries to sell the Brooklyn Bridge” is extremely dishonest; a person who “would buy the Brooklyn Bridge” is gullible.

Well, the Brooklyn Bridge is turning 125-years-old.

Happy Birthday Brooklyn Bridge. I'll catch ya at the diner for the early bird. We'll go whole hog and have real cream and sugar in our coffee.

BTW: It makes you wonder, if the Brooklyn Bridge is 125 and still standing up to the pounding of millions of commuters every year, what the hell happened to that bridge in Minneapolis last year? I guess they really don't make'em like they used to.

Yahoo News: Brooklyn Bridge celebrates 125th birthday

Clinton and Eight Belles, Two Broken Horses in Two Great Races

It is 11:32 pm here in the Midwest and Indiana is still too close to call. Clinton has 51 percent of the vote with Obama at 49 percent. Even with 92 percent of the vote in, no one is saying anything about the winner of this race. The reason? Lake county, the county closest to Chicago, has only reported 56 percent of their vote. Of that 56 percent, Obama has 65 percent.

So what does this mean. Well, two things. First, Obama could actually still win Indiana, but even if he doesn't, we have a little more clarity as to who the nominee should be for the Democrats.

Obama creamed Clinton in North Carolina by somewhere in the range of 230,000 votes. With a virtual split of Indiana and a big win in North Carolina, he has increased his lead in the popular vote and the pledged delegate vote. Even if he can't get to the magic number of 2,025 needed to secure a first ballot nomination, he will most likely lead Clinton when they walk into Denver.

The time has come for the good of the party for Hillary Clinton to stop campaigning. The math for her is terrible. And this isn't a sport, it is the future of our country. Unlike football or baseball, you shouldn't keeping fighting until the the final whisle for the sake of sportsmanship. Instead, for the good of the party and the good of the country, she needs to step aside.

She was hoping for a miracle, but what she got is what most of us get on a daily basis, a healthy dose of reality.

Like the filly who broke down at the Kentucky Derby, Hillary is going to finish second, but if she rides all the way to the finish line, she'll end up as nothing more than an also ran who ended up more hurt than the race was worth. And like those of us who love the Derby, watching her fail in her effort will do nothing more than leave a sour taste in our mouths.

Sen. Clinton, please don't be the Eight Belles of this campaign season. We're going to need you during the general election and after we take the White House. And in a race this important, a broken horse does us no good.