Thursday, March 22, 2007

FLASH! Newsday Sucks And So Do I

Edwards just walked out of his house and told everyone he is marching forward with his campaign. Yes, his wife has cancer in a rib but they think it is a small and managable occurance.

Well okay then. I guess I'll quit listening to the early reports and wait for the words to actually come from the candidate's mouth.

In the words of Rossana Rossana Danna, "Never mind."

CNN's coverage of Edwards staying in the race he never left.

UPDATE: If you are interested in how this whole mix-up started, here is one account from an editor at Network World. According to him and the source he cites, the whole thing started with a blogger...imagine that.

Paul McNamara's Blog

FLASH! John Edwards Suspends Presidential Campaign

In a sad piece of news, it appears that John Edwards' wife is again facing a fight with cancer. Newsday is reporting that his wife, Elizabeth recently heard from doctors that her breast cancer may have reappeared in one of her lungs. Edwards is said to be debating between two public statements, one suspending his campaign and one completely withdrawing. Regardless of your preferences going into this primary season, this is bad news for everyone. The voters need choices and the marketplace of ideas needs as many voices as possible.

But, putting the politics aside, it is my hope that John Edwards and his family can get through yet another trying time with his wife's health. Our hopes and prayers are with them.

Newsday Article

UPDATE, Newsday was wrong and Edwards is staying in the race. Fool me once Newsday...

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

I Love A Good Non Sequitur

This is a good comic on the subject of Hollywood news coverage.

Non Sequitur

Friday, March 09, 2007

The Dreaded Trouser Newt

My wife, among others, is likely to accuse me of defending the actions of President Clinton. I'm not. I don't condone married men getting blow jobs at the office from twenty-something interns. In fact, I don't condone married men getting it from anyone but their wives.

Others may accuse me of doing to Newt what the Republicans did to Clinton. That is also not true. Honestly, I don't care if Newt gets married twenty times and decides to have sex with that Nemo doll he's holding. As long as it isn't obviously illegal, his sexual proclivities are between himself and his wife(s).

But this hypocrisy about feeling obligated to prosecute President Clinton because he lied under oath about getting blown at the office by an intern cannot go unexamined. To quote the Trouser Newt and the AP story:

Gingrich argued in the interview, however, that he should not be viewed as a hypocrite for pursuing Clinton's infidelity.

"The president of the United States got in trouble for committing a felony in front of a sitting federal judge," the former Georgia congressman said of Clinton's 1998 House impeachment on perjury and obstruction of justice charges.

"I drew a line in my mind that said, 'Even though I run the risk of being deeply embarrassed, and even though at a purely personal level I am not rendering judgment on another human being, as a leader of the government trying to uphold the rule of law, I have no choice except to move forward and say that you cannot accept ... perjury in your highest officials."
Gingrich acknowledges affair during Clinton impeachment

Bullshit. They got Capone on tax evasion and they went after Clinton for not wanting to publicly admit that he got blow job from an intern.

As an ex-bartender, I can say I've heard lots of guys out there deny that they banged the chubby/ugly/crazy/slutty girl.

But you all forget, I saw you two walk out together, plastered, at 2:00 am the night before, and I heard her and her friends the next day talking about how you don't know how to go down on a girl -- so I KNOW you're lying.

(Lest you folks get the wrong impression, I heard just as many of those types of denials from women. In fact, maybe even more because the women not only wanted to deny the sex, they wanted to deny that they were drunk when they did it.)

Frankly, I could give a rat's arse when it comes to who is blowing/boinking who, just don't get all pious and scream "perjury" when someone lies about it, you know you've lied about it too.

And that is exactly what Gingrich did. When asked about his wandering Trouser Newt, he refused to answer the question. Had it been in a regular court instead of the court of public opinion, he would have been cited for contempt. And contemptible is exactly the word I would use to describe his attempts to paint his actions as anything but hypocrisy.

Newt, you knew that the Republicans had a great issue in "family values" and you tried your hardest to make sure that the voters knew which side of the fence you and your party were on when it came to extra-marital sex. Unfortunately, you forgot the "He who has not sinned..." part of your Sunday bible class and now it's jumped up to bite you in the ass.

We all know the score. Obama paid off his 17-year-old parking tickets from college and Gingrich is trying to clear the air about his cheating on his wives. They both think they might be President and don't want these stories to dog them through the next two years.

Gingrich practically admits it in the AP story.

Gingrich has said he is waiting to see how the Republican field shapes up before deciding in the fall whether to run.

Translation: "I have to see if my well-traveled Trouser Newt is going to hurt me too much to get elected."

For some, particularly the religious right, it might be enough to keep them from supporting your campaign. But when you combine the sex with the number of people who just can't stand a hypocrite, then Mr. Gingrich I think your chances were pretty much doomed by the dreaded Trouser Newt.

Monday, March 05, 2007

Heros? Not!

Very much like Buddy from The Incredibles, my hero has let me down. After a whole week, the Associated Press has decided to cover Paris Hilton again. Well, like a case of herpes, I guess we're just going to have to suffer from the occasional outbreak of Paris.

I think I'll send a bottle of Valtrex to the AP headquarters, I'd hate to see them spread their disease more often than is absolutely necessary.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

The Paris Hilton

I have a new hero. That hero's name is Jesse Washington, the Associated Press Entertainment Editor. Washington sent a memo to AP reporters telling them that Paris Hilton will no longer be mentioned on the AP Wire -- barring any major events. I'm hoping this ban includes any new photos of her "girlie bits" or the release of any more video tapes of her being naked/stupid/racist/drunk/stoned/or sexually engaged with some poor herpes infection waiting to happen.

Please let this be the beginning of a trend., are you listening? Leave this kind of reporting to the celebrity tabloids and stick to actual news.

AP Entertainment Editor Institutes Ban on Paris Hilton Coverage

By the way, that really is a photo of the Hilton Hotel in Paris.